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허전한 마음하나 로는 감출 수가 없는 외로움

I really wish Jyuni will release and promote a solo work soon. 2010, please? It's...2 days after the new year and I've finally came to blog. =) I did remind myself to write my new year resolutions in my new diary before the new year day ended, though. ^^ I shan't make them empty promises! Anyway, some obligatory wishes here too: I wish it'll be a year I successfully become more hardworking and achieve my goals. I wish it'll be a year I get to go Korea with my friends, with the money I will earn. I wish it'll be a year I feel like I accomplished something. I wish it'll be a year I will feel happy reminiscing about. 난 할 수 있어! 믿어 봐!

알 수 없는 미래와 벽 바꾸지 않아 포기할 수 없어

Well. It's one of those "Getting Jealous of Other's Lives" days. It's weird. In the beginning, I'll feel jealous of their dramatic lives and deep thoughts, then I'll feel, "Can't we live...simply?" 난 싫다. I want to stop this. It'll be one of my new year resolutions for 2010, along with "getting 3.5GPA average". 3.2 is just bullshit! It's not even enough to get into a Singapore University, what's more to say Hongik. I wish I can do better. I will! =)

잘지내고 있나요

Back from the 3/4F BBQ/Chalet...! =) Didn't stay overnight - broke, and I really hate to explain why I have to stay overnight and all that jazzus crap. Anyway, there was less than half the class there, no? It's good...and it's bad too, since it's a class chalet. Feel bad for the guys having to do all the BBQ-ing. I envy our chalet neighbours, who had everybody (well, a lot of them) out of the chalet and just BBQing or bullshiting together. It's a small area, but it's better than being divided. The next will be better! Hope the rest have fun overnight and... Please piss the annoying security guard off.

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It's the holidays, officially, starting today! I'm gonna do what I've procrastinated for so long. Fighting! Procrastination - to the left, to left, 귀찮은 procrastination move to the left! I said I was gonna go see BEG this Saturday, right? Well, I didn't. But I saw them during their fansign and, due to my change of luck, on Friday. What happened on Friday was me skipping my Korean lesson (미안해 선생님!) and going down to Marina Mandarin hotel with Michelle. I wasn't expecting to see them and when Michelle suddenly said, "Isn't that...Ga In?" I was like, "WUT?!" =P My heart inflated big time and my eyes were opened so wide. We kept waving, since they were right in front of us (perfect view) waiting at the lift lobby at the hotel, but no one returned the gesture. I heard Ga In call out "Unnie!" in that cute voice of hers, though! After they got onto the lift, we just kept on waving and finally(!!!), Narsha waved at us - no doubt because we w...

까만 눈물이 흘러 흐트러진 나 tonight

How much better can their songs get?! Abracadabra - didn't really like in the beginning, but addictive and it's lyrics are interesting. Sign - love at first listen. Moody Night - WTF was I doing missing out on this song?! I've been putting their albums on repeat for the one and a half days, and I realised just how much they've changed their musical style. From "I Got Fooled By You" to "Abracadabra" - it's a gigantic leap. If you were to to listen to both songs as an outsider, you wouldn't guess it's from the same artiste. They did try something more electronica with "How" but nothing compares to the songs in Sound G. I think it's the sexy feeling the songs oozes with. Their other hits were all innocent, cutesy (not Kara-cutesy) and sounds simple but the new songs are more sophisticated. It's actually a really good thing for them to upgrade their image. I guess they realised they can't always sing those romantic, bed-...

너와 마주치면 내 가슴은 roller coaster ride

아ㅏㅏㅏㅏ 진짜! 오늘의 한국어시험 조금만 어렵지만 ... 한 부분 정말 멍~~~~~~야 수업을 듣지 못해 때문에 맞죠? Had a test for Korean class today. It was only a little difficult, but there was a part that I practically went "o____O". Must be because I missed a class? Lucky lucky lucky...! =D Our Drawing Studio(DS)'s Theme Illustration assignment date due just got postponed to next Monday! DAEBAK! -pops confetti- Guess I have more time to work on my Chinese New Year card assignment... Speaking of DS - I really think my lecturer-in-charge is a little too involved in whatever we're doing for our assignment. Too many suggestions, too many "I think"s and "You should"s. Look, there are people who do art purely for the sake of making something beautiful so people will go "Woah...so nice!!", and there are people who do art so that it makes people think deep and interpret it their way. Here's a fact: I'm not the latter! As much as I agree (and almost forced myself that way) that I s...

기를 수 없는 사랑도 사랑 이니까

Pei told Jin and I something really hilarious a few days ago. That day there was gonna be a lecture with Michelle's class, so Pei was gonna sit with her and talk to her, since she's been so down lately. She went in, saw Mich chatting happily with her friends and told Unnie, "I think she's feeling better now/她很像好了". She told us that unnie disagreed and said, “No, this morning she came up to me, pointed at me like this, said 'Life is boring' and walked away." That was so made of win. I hope Michelle's feeling way, way better now... Because of Michelle's predicament, I think I understand some things now. As much as I think I'm freaking unlucky, it's actually being really lucky in a way. They are hilarious and minor things and actually great memories I wouldn't mind reminiscing about. Compared to other bigger troubles, mine is a piece of cake and I ought to even enjoy it. (My father kept telling me to stop being negative, too.) It...

I'm obsessed with you, wanna be with you.

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안녕, 브러그! =) 정말 오랜만이야...ㅎㅎ Right. It's so troublesome to have to think about how to form the sentence and then attempt to type it out. I need more practice! Anyways, like I mentioned, it's been a loooooooooongx3334657 time. Long. Time. Well I'm back! No emo posts, just an update. Hmm, a lot happened and it's a little hard to write everything down, so I'll just write about happy stuff. Like my current obsessions! Obsession #1 - You're Beautiful I love this show! It's so gay (Korean netizens, please don't bomb me), it's hilarious. Like freaking hilarious. It deserves better ratings than Boys Over Flowers, IMO. Maybe because I've seen it's adaptation in another language before, but I found the story of BOF nothing special. I admit I was hooked to it before, but that situation had changed and I'm more head over heels about You're Beautiful than I've ever been about BOF. Despite getting owned like nobody's business by IRIS, I'm ...

말도 없이

"지나간 열병처럼 잠시 아프면 되나봐 작은 흉터만 남게되니까" - 박신혜/9th Street I'm pissed right now, for something small. For something that happens to me all the time, but for this time, a bigger problem. Even if I said that, it's still considered a minute problem compared to stuff like death and sickness - but I've just about had enoughed! My headphones spoiled. -imagines all the =__= expressions I'll get- It's such a small matter isn't it! But I'm so annoyed. Number one, because it happened on a horrible day, adding to my annoyance and number two, I get blamed for it - when I didn't mishandle it! Seriously! I admit I sometimes pull and tug at my earphones too much but for this one, which costed 35 bucks, I treated it with care and even put it in a pouch! And it fucking spoilt! Screw you! I know I'm born unlucky, all sorts of crap happens and I feel terrible, but most of the time, I laugh it off because it's really amusing. This is something small but I really ...

이상한 일

If there's a word to describe today, I think the word is... weird . Seriously, man. (It's been a long time since I did long, full-coverage posts, so yea - I'm gonna type out everything that happened today, at 1.37AM. I'm sleepy, but I'll last.) 1. Went to Pei's house with some episodes along the way Pei' called to say we couldn't go her house because her sista needed to concentrate on studying for her exams This freaking loser scolding really vulgar Hokkien curse words, really loudly and the storyline, I guess, is about his -insert vulgar curse word- male enemy who knows about this "Melissa" person (obviously someone he likes, if not his girlfriend) and he wishes to beat the person up for seeing her 2. Watched 梁婆婆 stuff on Pei's computer before Michelle came OK, seriously. Don't look at me all weird. I didn't bring the VCD! My twin, Jin, did! I was going to die of thoughts like "WTF are we doing?!" but I enjoyed the show,...

ハナムケのメロディー

I can't think of a song that represents a night like this... 슬프지만, 미소를 짓다 - a bittersweet feeling, just how I like it best. Speaking my mind really helps, it's a good lesson learn and many of the troubles in my heart...They might not had a happy ending, but alas - they've stopped giving me insomnia. Even putting to rest something that I don't have to face since Secondary 2, but still bothers me whenever I think of it. I'm gonna say this though - I'm glad to have had you, Krystalle , in my life, however short, or long, it had been. I'm really sorry that something which happened while we were young had to change us like this, but perhaps it was for the good - fairytales and pretty, romantic stuff like "best friends" don't happen to everybody. Just like fairytales, our friendship was something we believed in while we were young. We might've given up on it, but I think we would both agree that it was a precious memory. I think I actually still...

Kissしたまま,さよなら

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"長く続くこの道に今はいない君へ KissしたままGoodbye" - 東方神起 How do you comfort someone whose loved one is gone? 내 사랑하는 언니의 엄마가... I hate today. Really. I thought Jin's little post-it on my hard disk made my day when I woke up and saw my brother (who will be having a vacation before NS starts again). Then in the evening, I picked up my handphone and saw a message from Yiting Unnie. It's depressing...I can't believe it actually happened. I feel so guilty about saying that she didn't fight for her chance to go Korea, quarrelling (but fortunately patching things up) with her a week or so ago and I'm so sorry this had to happen to her. I'm sorry I can't visit her today... And then my Dad had to come pick a fucking fight with me. I don't know why he has to keep making all these noise about me not bathing before 9PM, not making my bed, not fixing MY laptop's media bar... STOP IT! It's not even a big deal, your incessant nagging, but today is not the day and my p...

사랑이 죽는 병

"내 사랑이 서서히 죽어가는 병 조금 아프지만 낫고 싶은 마음은 없는걸 남김없이 기억이 지워져버려 서로가 남이었던 시간으로 되돌아가서 이젠 쉬고 싶어" - Super Junior I guess you want to rest now, Jay. In less than a week, fans from all over the world witnessed the downfall of a gradually rising boyband, 2PM. The leader - humble, charismatic and just plain hilarious Park Jaebeom - resigned from his position due to the negativity surrounding his dug-up past. The Koreans' pride were severely hurt and their revenge? Forcing him to cease all activities. As if that's not enough, there's even a petition for him to commit suicide . Childish. Rejoice, you people - he has had enough of these and is so depressed that he decided to quit 2PM on account of his love for his members, despite his management company, JYP Entertainment's official statement that they will not kick him out of the group. Aren't you guys happy? You have ruined his future and even wished for his death over comments made when he recently moved to Korea and is st...

하늘을 걸어서

"널 하늘에 있는 누군가 탐내서 가까이 두려고 (왜 묻지도 않고) 네 숨을 막고서 (널 갖고 싶어서) 그만 널 내 품에서 뺏어가나 봐" - Wheesung 이노래가 너무 좋아해요, 가사가 너무 예뻐서. I did a little research on how to get enrolled in Hongik University, even talked to Jae about it. I admit it's might seem a childish and pointless desire but still...It seems so complicated (there's even a Korean Proficiency test! =O) and for art courses, there's a drawing entrance exam! Aigoo, I feel depressed thinking about it. Even though I mgiht feel otherwise, drawing really is an important part of design. I'll treat my drawing classes with more respect and good attitude from now on! Being proficient in Korean... Honestly, I picked up this language just for fun, never imagining myself to become truly fluent. After watching some shows without English subtitles, I realised my listening comprehension sucks. I guess I'm still an 애송이...! 오늘 같은 날들, 슬픔을 느끼다. When it's the holidays, when I fall asleep at night thinking about what I did, when th...

사랑 안녕 사랑

"구름과 같이 멈출 수 없던 우리 행복했던 날" - 東方神起 You're irresponsible. It's not a school trip. I won't allow you to go if it's not a school trip. How do I know if your friend's irresponsible? You have so many excuses. It all boils down to one word - trust. You say I'm irresponsible, I don't call back every fucking hour when I'm at my friend's house. You call me when I stay out too late and when I tell you my printing's not done yet, you doubt me and even asked me to tell you the shop name. What is wrong with you? You call me irresponsible? I'm just being a normal teenager. You're the one fucked up and not trusting me - everything just seems irresponsible. I don't see other parents doing this to their child, no matter how strict they are. It feels liek one day I will run away from home, but that doesn't matter if I can get away from a control freak like you. I don't understand why you don't believe that I'm at my friend'...

내가 그대 없이

" Why does helping other people always end up with me sabotaging myself?! I think I like to help people, but why is it that after I help, I can't finish my own work? And when I can't finish my own work I became very irritable and will become annoyed at everyone. I can't be on MSN now because if I talk anymore somebody will get pissed at me soon if they say anything I usually don't mind. Poor unnie, she probably has enough of my moodswings... And Jin and Pei - whoever I talked to. FUCKING IRRITATING! It's hard to be nice. I'm not cut out to be nice - but I just can't be downright mean, though. I hate this...! Stupid submissions! My brain's getting fried and I'm annoying everybody. If only they understand and if they do, if only they can stand it. I want to be in Korea. 지금 한국에 가고싶어요...! 눈물이 언제까지 멈춰요?

니가 밉다

"니가 미워 죽겠다 (이런 니가 더) 내가 싫어 죽겠다 (이런 내가 더)" - 2PM I hate you so much sometimes I want to strangle you. It sounds like I'm a evil, crazy person but if you were in my shoes you would understand. I hate sadness more than anger. I'll rather be pissed but I'm so dissappointed. I will be a better parent - if not, I won't be one.

Stay Together

"널 잊을거라고 goodbye 약속했지만 아직 널 보면 나 떨려 we got stay together 잠이 오질 않아 너도 나와 같은지" -2NE1 This song rocks. ♥♥♥ Typed the post on my way home today. My head kinda hurt after that, lol. Annyong! =) I’m currently on the bus typing this entry on the bus home after another of my fun (but sometimes sleep-inducing) Korean class. If you ask why I’m doing this on the bus it’s because I’ve never posted anything on the blog for a very long time!!! Even when something good happened. I’m turning into a A-plus pro at procrastination and it’s time to fix it with blogging! =D Omo, suddenly there’s so many NP people on the bus – isn’t it already 7.30PM++?? My quiet bus ride home is gone..! –sob sob- Oh well. Today’s class was sleep-inducing for the first part but it got interesting as Ms Cho made us learn vocab like “in front”, “behind”, “outside” by making us draw things in a bedroom. I know, I’m gonna scan my “room” in and upload it later! =3 Ms Cho told us she bought gifts from Korea – stickers ...

여자는 몰라

"오늘도 니가 떠난 방에 혼자 남아 나는 너밖에 몰라" - FT Island I think my luck just zhuan-ed. Serious. I can't believe it. We're having a study trip to Korea in September. Study trip. TO KOREA ! KOREAAAAAAAAAAAA ! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhH! #@%@#%&^ %*WDSAHD GJTUIKDHSDGS SDGADJH ASGWJP WOWOERTO AHEB HWEUO %$WTIWMEV)PW VMS S E EGOW VOIEVM OSSG !!!!! With our lovely Korean teacher, Jae (who does not teach us Korea but is actually one of the lecturers in FDS)! My god. I love her. I really do. I've heard of the trip before, but it was then only limited to the DGDD students. However, she knew there were a lot of us who wanted to go too (well, for other purposes but...!) so she actually made it a study trip for anyone that wants to go! ♥ I feel exactly like how Hyung Joon felt when he realised the gathering Hwangbo invited them to was with the Wonder Girls: (01:23) If I may quote a really lame/funny/LOL line from Suju's song, "Miracle" - Life couldn't get better~~~! 내 심장 터...

10점 만점에 10점

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"뒷모습이 너무 사람을 괴롭게 해 착한 나를 자꾸 나쁜 맘을 먹게 해" - 2PM OMG Micky, thanks so much. "ASSA! No more long, untidy hair"...or so I thought: HAHA! =P It's messy all right, but at least it isn't long and really disturbing like the Secret Code tour's. I think it's quite cute and omg, I think I have a maggie hair obsession?! o__O I think he got it cut not purely because of the Bangkok concert but also, and mostly, because of the upcoming Tokyo dome performance next weekend. I mean, it's gonna be on DVD, OK!! I wouldn't be seen dead in that knid of hairstyle on DVD! ON DVD, people! Everybody (fans, TV viewers [when TBS show it next year and the years after] and DBSK themselves) will always see his hair in that state. Thankfully, it's all gone . ASSA! 10 points out of 10! ♥ Because I'm random like that. And I really want to see them live...! Why are you in Bangkok? =( Singapore. Is . A. Part. Of. Asia. Thank you.