골묵을 돌리면
The rain poured and then...it stopped. Usually it would pour and then next thing you know the temperature's back to being uncomfortably warm. But tonight, the presence of the rain from before lingers and while it may not be Winter, the cold is still quite chilling to the bones. And there's no wind blowing. Nothing.
It really feels foreign, literally. This stillness and atmosphere reminds me of hotels so quiet that it makes me wonder now if there were other guests there at all.
Looks like all that Haruki Murakami reading paid off. My post sounds so novel-ish! I hope I can remember what I what to say.
So. I have an unnie which I usually (affectionately/out of knowing her) address as "이상한 언니" (Weird Older Sister in Korean), due to her weird habits and thinking. Not downright wacko, but unusual. I guess you can say it might actually be a good thing since it's called "creativity" when you think "out of the box", but there are things like common courtesy /capabilities (if I may coin this phrase) that everyone should at least know. I guess it makes her an unnoticed spectator in life because of that.
But honestly, I don't think I'm any better.
Sometimes I really think I should be an actor. I pretend so well I think I fool even myself.
I try my hardest but I can't really handle human interactions well, but thanks to that effort, even close friends think I'm doing fine.
I don't know what to say; I can't really express myself well; and I get nervous.
I know, I probably think too much, that's why it stops me - because I don't want to sound stupid or redundant.
Conversing is one, second is that I can't seem to grow attached to people easily. It's so hard to explain, I feel so lazy.
Maybe I should just be loud.
Maybe I'm just self-absorbed, really.
Or maybe I should blame my mother for turning me into a cynic - even recently when I told her about a friend I made on the first day of work, she said, "can she be called a friend when you only know her for a day?"
I don't know, do you?
It really feels foreign, literally. This stillness and atmosphere reminds me of hotels so quiet that it makes me wonder now if there were other guests there at all.
Looks like all that Haruki Murakami reading paid off. My post sounds so novel-ish! I hope I can remember what I what to say.
So. I have an unnie which I usually (affectionately/out of knowing her) address as "이상한 언니" (Weird Older Sister in Korean), due to her weird habits and thinking. Not downright wacko, but unusual. I guess you can say it might actually be a good thing since it's called "creativity" when you think "out of the box", but there are things like common courtesy /capabilities (if I may coin this phrase) that everyone should at least know. I guess it makes her an unnoticed spectator in life because of that.
But honestly, I don't think I'm any better.
Sometimes I really think I should be an actor. I pretend so well I think I fool even myself.
I try my hardest but I can't really handle human interactions well, but thanks to that effort, even close friends think I'm doing fine.
I don't know what to say; I can't really express myself well; and I get nervous.
I know, I probably think too much, that's why it stops me - because I don't want to sound stupid or redundant.
Conversing is one, second is that I can't seem to grow attached to people easily. It's so hard to explain, I feel so lazy.
Maybe I should just be loud.
Maybe I'm just self-absorbed, really.
Or maybe I should blame my mother for turning me into a cynic - even recently when I told her about a friend I made on the first day of work, she said, "can she be called a friend when you only know her for a day?"
I don't know, do you?
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